Well hello there friend! Thank you for writing to me on your blog and updating me on your fun times in a tourist town. I loved every second of it ! ( for those of you who read my blog that aren't Aut --- which I seriously doubt is anyone, but one can only wonder, click here to view Aut's letter to me !) I am glad to hear that you are enjoying your time where you are and that God is growing you in really cool ways.
Hmmm... If I had to update you on my entire life at the moment in one word (which is enjoyable to me because it is a challenge and an adventure to try to find one word to describe something that would normally take a lifetime of words to explain) that word would be fearful. Although I would like to get on here and tell you all of the things that are going amazingly in my life in spite of my fear, I wouldn't be the candid person that I am if I did. So fearful it is. Yes, God is constantly working in spite of my fearful heart, praise Him for that!
I am realizing (just about 10 mins ago to be exact ) that fear is a crippling emotion. It has seemed to unknowingly have creeped into most all of the aspects of my life. Fear is also funny because, although is it the root of what is going on it has a way of disguising itself with things like pride, depression, and a need to control. By doing this, I believe that fear gets away with much more than it ever should.
I think that my fearful nature at this moment in my life is due the the lack of my believing in God's sovereignty (as you mentioned in your blog). I think it also has a good bit to do with the fact that I have allowed the evil one to distort my thoughts into something that resembles the thoughts of my old self that was buried with Christ ! So right now I am speaking out that I am a new creation in Christ Jesus ...The OLD is GONE and the NEW is HERE!
And while breaking free of my fearful nature may be a journey ... it is one that I am willing to take ...
I miss you and I cant wait to see you! ( you like how I said that like A.I know when it was going to be and B. as if it were just around the corner --- because i believe both of those things to be true!)